COMEDIAN Alan Davies surpassed himself when he laid into Wanderers in his column in The Times.

The Arsenal fan described the Reebok Stadium as "hate-filled", Wanderers fans as "emotionally unstable" and referred to Sam Allardyce as Samantha Dyke throughout the piece.

It's a brave move to do that sort of thing to Big Sam's face. Davies, however, took the more sensible option of waiting until he was at Macclesfield railway station on his way back to London from the recent Wanderers-Arsenal game before penning his childish bile.

Whether he has been within 200 miles of Sam or the Reebok since is doubtful.

Davies couldn't control his scattergun name-calling of every non-Arsenal detail of his trip as he attempted to get his frustration out of his system.

As well as attacking the Wanderers manager, fans and stadium (which he just had to say had a funny-shaped roof), he broadened his unhappy horizons by insulting the people of the North-west and finally, with nothing original left to say, he informed his southern-based audience that it's "grim up North". Never heard that one before.

It was the kind of response you would expect from a five-year-old when a class-mate calls his favourite football team rubbish.

Davies' problem is that he is an Arsenal fan who travelled up expecting to see the fabulous Gunners -- and there is no sarcasm in that description as Arsene Wenger's side is a mesmerising sight in full flow -- beat Wanderers hands down.

He simply couldn't handle seeing little Bolton playing mighty Arsenal off the park to such an extent that a relieved Wenger praised Wanderers and admitted he was happy to get a point.

Wenger impressed all by taking a bad day like a man. It's a shame that one particular Arsenal fan couldn't do the same.

Still, Davies could take one professional success out of the day. He made us laugh for once.