I HAVE come up with THE perfect money-making scheme – a silent dentist's drill.
I admit I am a complete wuss when it comes to sitting in the dentist's chair.
Without doubt it is the thing that I hate more than any other activity.
And sadly, I've had to spend a fair bit of time there recently thanks to a cracked tooth, which had to be removed.
I'll confess I was slightly gutted that I didn't get a bravery sticker and a lolly (probably not a brilliant thing when you've just had work done on your teeth). Sometimes it really does suck being a grown-up.
I don't know what it is about the dentist. I mean I've never been in any actual pain because of him. In fact my dentist is generally the chap who stops the pain, so I should like him.
Obviously the giant, metal needles used to numb your face are most certainly not pleasant.
And the numb feeling itself can be mortifying, especially if you've got to be back at work and unable to move most of your face. Drinking a brew becomes an impossibility, which never makes me happy as I struggle to function without caffeine.
But one of the most terrible things about being stuck in the dentist's chair is.......THE DRILL.
As I've already said, it doesn't hurt. But the noise of someone drilling into your mouth is absolutely terrifying.
Thankfully, my dentist is well aware of my feeble wimpishness and has even offered me gas and air so I can “get through” the experience.
So, I think if I could invent a silent drill, my (and I suspect thousands of other people's) phobia of the dentist would vanish instantly.
I have one or two problems with this “brilliant” scheme. The fact I have absolutely zero engineering or technical knowledge means I would struggle to make my plan a reality I fear.
But I still think this is a brilliant idea – and I hope someone comes up with the goods soon.
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